I mean, think about it. We spend soooooooo much of our time as mothers trying to make everyone around us think we’re doing ok, that we love motherhood and everything that goes with it ALL THE TIME; that we don’t compare ourselves unfavourably to other mothers (who, incidentally feel exactly the same way as we do but are too afraid to admit it!); that it’s ok to not take time for ourselves….the list could (and invariably) does go on.
So here’s the skinny (oh yeah, let’s talk about baby weight too while we’re at it!) from a 20-year ‘veteran’ mother of 4.
My email address used to be supermum at cybergal dot com. They were these free and very cool domain names back in the early ‘noughts’. When they were phased out, no-one was more relieved than me. Had I given myself that email address? What was I thinking?
I might have been on top of things with two children (that I had in my 20’s), but I discovered that having kids in your 30s (when you already HAVE two kids), is much harder. The old ‘bod’ ain’t what it used to be. Bits have slipped – nay, fallen off; years of sleep deprivation have taken their toll, and of course every mother knows that you give birth to least one million brain cells with every baby, so there really is no hope for me!
Standards started to slip. Permanent day-time sleepwear became vogue, hair didn’t get washed for several weeks on end, bed-times stretched, showers weren’t had, too much tv was watched, the nutritional value of some meals was highly debatable, children were late being dropped off and picked up from activities; and in some cases, not picked up at all! (It was ONE TIME OK! - and have I ever been allowed to forget it!?!)
Well, that’s not entirely true. There was that one time when I first became a mother. I walked out the door of a new parents’ morning tea, leaving my newborn on the kitchen table. (I remembered when I got to the car, ok?) Oh, and that other time when I left my [4th] baby at a family wedding (but she was with family, so that’s ok right??)
With falling standards came fallen expectations, and with fallen expectations came the knowledge that no-one is perfect, that kids are resilient and can deal with some fairly incompetent parenting from time to time, and [to quote richard carlson], i learned to not sweat the small stuff.
Tired, hungry or cranky; scary or not - I’m proud to be a mum.
go see jill over at scary mommy
and read all the fabulous 'scary' stories!
(i don't know what happened with the link there
i blame my well worn baby brain!)